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Dictionary of New Epigrams

Pessimism

1. At the heart of pessimism is a man feasting on donut holes and complaining of hunger.

2. The pessimist whimpers no where; the optimist bellows yes!

3. Lifting a pessimist to optimism is like lifting water with a sieve.

4. Saying no to one opportunity will send away a hundred.

5. The man who says it’s impossible can probably go online and buy it tomorrow.

6. Pessimists are happiest when convincing one another they are right.

7. Pessimists and optimists are like mushrooms; they pop up on the rainy days.

8. There is nothing sadder than a pessimist at an amusement park.

9. It’s more fun working hard when you believe you will succeed.

10.Pessimism is wonderful if you want to be unhappy and chase away love.

11. A pessimist believes everyone is as pessimistic as he is, and he proves it every time he talks to someone.

12. I used to be a pessimist, but it was boring and depressing, so I decided to treat other people better, and now I feel happy and interested in lots of things.

13. The optimists have all the fun, and the pessimists all the grief.

14. This may not be the best of all possible worlds, but it’s the best one we’ve got.

15. If you’re a born pessimist, learn to take advantage of your perspicuity.

16. The pessimist rejects the good, bad and indifferent and clings to bitterness.

17. The rational pessimist always has three ways to escape, even from success.

18. The Tick was a pessimist when he said, “Gravity is a cruel mistress,” but one can find ways to work with gravity; it’s time that’s inexorable.

19. In most elections, it is choosing the lesser of two evils, but in this one, it’s choosing the devil who is least likely to get us all killed.

20. The pessimist looks at problems and grumbles; the optimist looks at them and works on a solution.

21. How can one be a pessimist after kissing Glenfiddich?