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Some past examples of my treatment of aphorisms are found in Philosophers Squared – and A Dictionary of New Epigrams – and 147 Delphic maxims. Today, I am continuing to rewrite a book I read in the 1960s, but I’ll not mention the title and the author’s name until it’s done. It’s a silly game to encourage people to read some old quote books and “know the wisdom” of our ancestors. There may be about twenty-three posts of these commonly thought things. That’s a task!

  1. He’s not lazy! He’s just highly motivated by pillows.
  2. They are like two atoms, identical, and they repel each other.
  3. I’m not supposed to spit in public, so I spit twice as much at home.
  4. They are as crazy as squirrels in the mating season.
  5. They’re as happy as a crowd of lonesome drunks.
  6. He’s as wrapped up in himself as Houdini in a straitjacket.
  7. As welcome as another beer when you have to piss and can’t.
  8. He’s as useless as expired movie tickets.
  9. You are useless and unwanted! Get used to it or do something useful.
  10. There’s little choice between a sticker in your sock and a rock in your shoe.
  11. If you need to be flattered, hold meat before a hungry dog.
  12. You created your habits, now you get to live with them.
  13. I am a human being, and anger is an emotion that’s available to me.
  14. Mount Everest doesn’t fear a windy night.
  15. Fly-fishermen live on their wife’s vegetables.
  16. Too quiet a life is as painful as too stressful a one.
  17. Arrogance is a symptom of unappreciated abilities.
  18. A fool is still a fool even when buried in gold.
  19. It’s hard to sleep in a barn with a braying ass.
  20. All living things are approximately equal and must fight you.
  21. Suspicion sees itself when looking in a mirror and projects it onto others.
  22. My only excuse is that it seemed like the right thing to do at the time.
  23. I did it because it was the best option I had.
  24. Some beautiful things do not need to hide a hook.
  25. Bald heads are more easily kept tidy than hairy ones.
  26. With good behavior and plentiful cash, you can eat breakfast.
  27. There’s no use howling at the phone you’ve dropped into the sea.
  28. Cultivate angry wrinkles in your face, and you will be shunned.
  29. Beauty won’t impress the butcher, but it will the butcher’s son.
  30. The possibility of heaven and hell keeps most people honest.
  31. When the dinner bell sounds, the mouth begins watering the teeth.

That’s the second batch of codified common sense.