Today I was the facilitator for the Human Development group and as part of that job I was to give a short presentation on some relevant subject to get the discussion fired up. Our group is usually about twenty-five people, most of whom have been professional counselors of some kind, and some are actually on their pay clock while with us. Most of these people have been involved in helping other people who are failing at some aspect of their lives and were either assisting in some form of state-sponsored helping or helping people who were seeking some professional guidance.
My presentation was aimed at helping people who were already moving along my March 29, 2016 maturity scale — Infant – Child – Adolescent – Adult – Mature – Sage – Ourora. The idea presented in that scale has been upgraded some since that post with the addition of the post – How to direct what is called growth toward maturity.
“The idea for this new direction of growing toward maturity is, “When you are feeling good, and have time and energy to do something different from your routine, choose to avoid actions that are childish and do actions that are as mature as possible.” That is a generalization that should work in all cultures.
Create more mature habits when you have the chance to do so.”
The five-minute presentation went smoothly enough and it included the example of a family going skiing with behaviors mentioned for infant through sage. There were several challenges from the group that I was misbehaving by telling people what they should do. I responded that I was only suggesting that they consider choosing the more mature option of the opportunities placed before them and that the best time to examine and choose those options was when they were feeling most free and expansive. That I had chosen the family skiing excursion as an example because in that situation there were opportunities to explore and demonstrate more mature behaviors for each of the defined levels.
There were complaints of my putting people into boxes – infant through sage – and that people are individuals and not categories. What could I say in response but that I agree with them, but when speaking we must communicate with words and they are inherently defined boxes, and what I was trying to communicate was a way of coping with one’s life in a way that would develop habits that would serve them better in the long run.
To this end the idea of going on a child-safe trail doing a search and rescue mission with children would automatically give a child a mature orientation to a situation. That helping people in the greater community, which is a mature activity, can be participated in by a child. That those kinds of acts by an older, and presumably mature person, would not be telling a child what to do but would be illustrating what kinds of things could be done. The skiing would be just as much fun for the child, and they would be developing the skills of skiing, but they would also be developing adolescent proof of self-worth, adult participation in a worthwhile family activity, mature doing something worthwhile for the greater community, and possibly sage-like in that they were illustrating how a person could set an example for all of the people of the world to observe and learn a worthwhile lesson.
This was my first public talk on how to develop more mature habits.