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The various experiments I have been doing with the end goal in mind of helping people gain control of their bodily weight have been going well. The basic premise of this diet is to find actions that are so easy to do that they become automatic; after a week of doing them with a conscious intent, soon they are habitual. The only willpower involved is remembering to do some laughably easy thing. Other diets require so much willpower they are soon abandoned.

In order to practice this diet I and my partner have been intentionally leaving a small portion of food on our plate at the end of every meal. In the learning phase of this habit, we chose to pick out the best piece of each part of a serving and place it to the side of our plate. The goal was to make a small pile of choice food that would equal a single bite so the food we were rejecting was a meaningfully large amount. It was additionally meaningful because we knew that bite would be very tasty. The first few days we did this setting aside of good food we made the portion size very small so we weren’t feeling any guilt caused by not eating it. But after we had some comfortable familiarity with that laugh-out-loud action we upped the amount we set aside to where it felt significant, but we were still able to laugh about it. After we finished eating our slightly shrunken meal we would then push that final bite to the center of the plate and leave it. Okay, if the cook feels that procedure is too wasteful it’s okay for them to blend those last bites into the next meal. The point is to think and to say, “I am in control of food; food is not in control of me!” “I don’t have to eat food just because it is available; I even have the power to throw good food away.”

A strange side effect of this silly procedure is that we have been putting a little less on our plate and we even stopped eating a few times before the plate was clean. We stopped when we were down to our laugh-out-loud portion. I can still hear my mother and grandmother too saying, “Charles … clean up your plate!” That often heard statement was often coupled with the contradictory one, “You better take a second helping, you might need some stick-to-your-ribs food before dinner.”

I am creating a list of polite things to say to get out of eating things that are outside of the LOL diet plan. In that case:

I’d really like some more but I’m full. Can I take a little home for tomorrow?