― Robert Frost
As a person becomes more emotionaly mature they reach a condition where they appreciate everything in the world as being perfect, which is a similar attitude to Dr. Pangloss’s view in Voltaire’s book Candide. Pangloss considered this the best of all possible worlds and from a mature point of view this is a good attitude, and with Pangloss I would concur that we must accept the world as it is as perfect. The past is gone and past changing, the present is as it is and therefore might as well be considered perfect because it is as it is and can be no other way. It is the future which might not be perfect, but on the other hand every moment of the future will be just another example of the present now, and with this attitude, or call it philosophy if one wants to be kind, it will also be what it is and thus another moment of perfection.
However, if we could change the future, in even some very tiny way, it would no longer be the same example of perfection, but some alternate perfection. Perhaps from our personal perspective this alternate perfection could be a more perfect perfection than another one which might otherwise exist. From this perspective it makes sense to do what is necessary to bring about this perfect condition rather than another one. This is not to imply that any perfection will be better than the perfection which actually comes to pass, but it is one which at the present we may consider to be better, and therefore the one that we ought to exert our energies to bring into being. No matter how momentarily that perfection might actually exist.
It would appear that if we want to love and be loved in this future present we should do things in this present which will bring about that future condition, but to do this must mean that we accept the present moment as perfect.
That is okay because we should love our other and ourself exactly as they and we are, and if we can do that it is the best possible way to achieve the future state of acceptance. If we love what exists and what we have then it is easy for this state to continue to exist until any moment in the future, and if we develop the habit of loving what is and therefore treating it with respect and kindness, which is easy to do when we have the belief and habit that what is is perfection, then it becomes very easy for our interlocutor to relate to us in this very pleasant way. Our personal world becomes even easier to live with and accept because it is reacting wholly to positive emotional input. Most people find themselves mirroring the emotions which come their way, and if you are in an emotional condition of projecting warmth and acceptance then it becomes very easy for others to reciprocate.
Love becomes a natural reciprocation for a mature person.