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Too many people are just plain boring! It is not that the world around them has nothing interesting to report upon. And possibly it is not that they haven’t a thought in their head, although that is a more likely possibility. It because they have developed some bad habits and habits can be changed.

The reason most people are boring is because they are not responding to the ongoing conversation and the primary reason for that failing is because they are not paying attention to the conversation. Thus whenever they do say something it isn’t relevant to what other people are presently interested in. They don’t seem to realize that just talking, during a pause, isn’t participating if what they say is irrelevant. It might appear that these interupters are caught up in their own inner dialogue and that is why they blurt out a non sequitur but the problem goes much deeper. The external behavior betrays an inner conflict. They are, almost certainly, engaged with a similar babel of dialogue of non sequiturs within their own mind. Thus as time passes with these type of conversations going on they become ever more confused and boring even to their own selves. They begin to the feel pain of being disconnected from other human beings and from themselves.

You might ask, How do I know these things? It is simply because I have those problems myself and that’s why I can speak with expertise born of personal experience. I am a boring person sometimes and people get annoyed with me and complain at my interruptions quite often. I like to think I interrupt because I hate to miss riffing a good joke and that is often dependent upon a bit of quick but interjective repartee. My riff may give others a moment of derisive laughter but the joke is disruptive and that is the characteristic of a boring person. Furthermore, those lame attempts at idle humor clearly mean that some major portion of my brain is engaged in thoughts other than the topic of discussion.

The way not to be a bore is to pay attention to what others are saying when they are talking; and when they are not talking or you are alone pay close attention to what you are thinking and saying to your self. If you have nothing to say remain silent.  

The way to be interesting is to be interested in what’s happening.

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